Panic at the Disco's debut album may be called A Fever You Can't Sweat Out, but tonight their obsessive fans are trying to do just that. Overworked bar staff are reduced to lining up glasses of tap water, which the frantic teenagers chuck all over themselves and each other. Meanwhile, the security men work like human fishing hooks, yanking shirtless bodies from the jar of writhing maggots that the Astoria has become. The band charge ahead with their 100mph punk pop regardless.

If ever there was a gig to make you feel old, this is it - the speed of the music alone is enough to induce juvenile dementia. The American foursome, who started out by covering Blink 182 songs, were discovered by Fall Out Boy, via a comment left on Livejournal. They later topped the MySpace music chart - while still in high school. You start wondering if you even speak the same language.

They're good with words though, being an aptly named band, as are their songs. Camisado, which translates from Spanish as a stealthy night-time attack, bursts out like an emergency. "Let's get these teen hearts beating faster, faster," sings Brendon Urie, trying to induce cardiac arrest on Lying Is the Most Fun a Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off. The longest thing about this band is the titles, though it turns out they've borrowed that line from the film Closer, while The Only Difference Between Suicide and Martyrdom Is Press Coverage is lifted from the novelist Chuck Palahniuk.

The beauty of frontman Urie's vocals must be at a pitch only audible to teenagers, as the whiny tone grates on the eardrums of us ancient twentysomethings. "That's it," says the poised heartthrob, 45 minutes and a lifetime after they began. "We've run out. We didn't write any more."